NaNo ’11 Day 10

*sigh*
My “third” write in–second if you only count the ones with other people. I was there for two hours, but I only managed about a half hour’s worth of work.
Or rather, I only managed to try to write for about a half hour; I think I might have written about 100 words while I was there….

And I did not make the daily goal today. That seems to happen when my mother starts bitching at me when all I did was answer a question my dad asked.
*headdesk*
I’ll never figure my parents out. It’s one of those days I wish I could win the lottery, just so I could buy a house and move out right away…instead of having to wait and save up from a job.
I mean, I think I’m capable of taking care of myself; it’s other people that I have problems with.

Frankly, if Wikipedia is to be believed (WebMD is giving me much of the same information), I think I might have one of those schizoid disorders.
Unsociable, eccentric, preference for a solitary lifestyle, check. Sexual apathy, check.
Elaborate and internal fantasy world, check. (Wanting to live in the stories I write counts for that “fantasy world” bit, right?)
Sensitivity–depends on the kind we’re talking about; if it has to do with “it hurts when my parents treat me like garbage,” yeah, I’m a little too sensitive. If it’s “sensitive to other people’s feelings”…to hear my folks tell it, I’m not the least bit sensitive. But it’s kind of hard to be sensitive when the only feelings they allow themselves to show lately is anger and spite. (By lately, I mean “starting when my nephew was born, and growing progressively worse.)
Excitability, check.
Fondness for nature and books…what do you think? The only thing limiting that “fondness for nature” is my allergies.
Honesty…to an excess, if the fights with my parents are anything to judge by.
There’s a few more, but it’s hard to say whether I really fit in those, or if it’s only how my parents perceive it: like the “cold emotional attitudes.”
Few close friends, except for first degree (I assume meaning “immediate”) family…check, until recently. I used to have a good relationship with my folks, or I thought I did…and I have no idea why that’s changed. Now it’s simply “few close friends,” unless you count people I’ve only talked with online.
I would hate to think of any of this as a disorder, because I don’t believe enjoying solitude is “abnormal” or wrong…but various sources say that those with a Schizoid personality disorder are often unaware that there is anything wrong with them. So the question is, if this is what I have…what do I do about it?

Anyway, depression over…I hope.

Daily goal: 1667
Words written: 1534
Total goal: 16667
Total written: 15425 (ouch!)
Report card: At this rate, you won’t finish on time.
A minimum daily count of  1728.75 words would let me finish on time.
My notes to story ratio is about 1 to 29 (just shy of 30) words, leaving an anticipated full draft at over 120,000. I kind of liked the 140,000 estimates, but that’s what happens once I start using the notes again….

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